i think i may have killed my computer.

but i'm not sure.

either way, it keeps telling me there's a disk read error and to restart.  it never gets passed that.  oddly enough, i have made NO attempt at getting it fixed.  i don't know why.  lately in life, i have become careless.  i really could CARE LESS about pretty much almost everything. 

the only thing i find that i am concerned about is that my hard drive might be fried.  i am not looking forward to asking everyone i know for pictures that they may or may not still have.  i am also disinterested in re-downloading ALL of the music i had. 

i just keep hoping that it's a hardware issue since i have been travelling back and forth with the computer but i think i am really just trying my best to avoid facing reality: i probably lost EVERYTHING because i am one of those morons who doesn't back up.

hmm what else can i rant on about....

i keep having these REALLY strange dreams/feelings.  i don't remember the details of what happens in them, but i never forget the feeling i get after i wake up.  it's almost haunting.  i would like to figure them out or for them to just freakin go away.  it just gets really annoying to walk around feeling uncomfortable about SOMETHING but you aren't sure what or why.  REALLY EFFING ANNOYING.  i can only hope that i am feeling like this for a legitimate reason and not because i am probably absolutely insane.

otherwise life is good.  had to cancel my san francisco trip that was planned for my birthday.   probably a good thing.  my birthday sucks anyway....always lands on memorial day weekend.

umm, i guess i'm done for now.  i really should be studying right now but i'm just wasting time.  i'll write another POINTLESS blog the next time i get access to a computer or if i feel like using the wii for internet.